Pitfalls of communication

Communication is not as easy as it sounds. Our individual experiences in life make the simple act of sending a message and receiving it is positively complicated. When I say something to someone, a lot of other things come into force. For instance, what appropriate words do I use? How do I say these words--subtle intonations and inflections could make a huge difference to the message! There is also the issue on timing and the actual content of what I am saying. And if this is not enough, there’s the other person to consider. What is his/her state of mind? Is the receiver happy, sad, worried, angry, inebriated, tired--the possibilities are endless! I will not even go into non-verbal communication, meanings between the lines, body language, etc.

When I was studying mass communications in university, I thought it was the most interesting subject in the world. Little did I know that in practise, good communication is an art form. Some people have the knack for it. Most are just hopeless!

I don’t know if I have the natural talent for it. I worry too much about the message, grammar, pronunciation, perception, etc. I decided early on that I preferred to listen to people and observe them from afar. I like to know what the other person is thinking before I express my own opinion. Is that bad? I don’t think so. As far as I am concerned it is more interesting to know the other’s point of view so you know where you stand. Besides few people ever bother to listen!

The point I am getting at (see what I mean about communication?) is communication is vital in building meaningful relationships-- be it in business, friendship or marriage. Listening to other people’s opinions, hard as it may seem at times--believe me there are total idiots out there, is necessary for a harmonious relationship. Let me see…now about that war in Iraq…

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I couldn’t believe it but in less than eight weeks I’ll be in Manila. This visit was totally unplanned, which is very unlike me but I just knew I had to make this trip. Much as I would love to see old friends and family, I am filled with trepidation. C’mon I hear you say, what’s the matter? Well, I have grown accustomed to my privacy. I know damn well that in Manila, there is no such thing as privacy. It’s one noisy, raucous and boisterous place. Every time I visit, I get sick! I should remember to pack my organic vitamins, Echinacea and my anti-bacterial hand hygienic gel. I was born and bred in that city and yet I find myself a little scared of it now. One thing I’m sure of, my heart will not stop pumping adrenalin through my veins the moment I step off the plane. Going to Manila always does that to me. I suppose it is anticipation of excitement and danger. It brings out my basic instincts! The only other city that came close to that feeling was Singapore and perhaps Hong Kong.

Why is it that we hold such ideal images of the past in our minds? In my memory, the sun was always shining in the Philippines! I do not remember Manila weather in July anymore. I hear it is the rainy season so I must not forget my waterproof. But what will I find? My friends and family a lot older-- more potholes, traffic, pollution?

Ah, I shall remain the optimist and hope for the best. Hmm, I think I should start shopping for my holiday wardrobe--or shall I hit the malls in Manila? Ooops I just felt another kick of adrenalin then!